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8/9 My Novel Unforgettable'

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posted by Mitsushiro Nakagawa alias mitsushiro-nakagawa on Saturday 30th of January 2016 11:53:53 AM

8/9 My Novel Unforgettable' _________________________________ _________________________________ My Novel >> Unforgettable' (This book is Dedicated to the future artist.) Mitsushiro Nakagawa All Translated by Yumi Ikeda . images. U2 - No Line On The Horizon Live in Dublin It was a little past twelve when Kei arrived at Rika’s apartment in Meguro. Signs of life faded completely though the light was still left in the street. Kei who rushed up the stairs of the subway at a stretch put the cellular phone into the pocket and regained his breath leaning against the door of her room on the 2nd floor, and then pushed the intercom after repeating deep breathing a few times. “You are late....” Rika’s hair was wet. She shot Kei a look like feeling out on Kei’s mind. For a while, Kei leaned against the door, exhaled the rest of the breath to the darkness downstairs trying to make Rika unconscious. “Anything?” “Nothing...” Kei gazed at Rika. He smelled the rinse in the chill. A meaningless list of English letters on T- shirt bulged softly and made a dim shade with the light from the kitchen. Rika wiped the sweat on Kei’s forehead with her hand. She went up to him, stared fixedly at his eyes and said uneasily. “What‘s wrong with you?” Kei went to her back without answering it and took a breath of a sweet smell of her wet hair. The distorted pain throbbing in his chest faded away a little. Then he slowly held her shoulders in his arms. Her body was all cold due to the air-conditioner. “I don’t mind....” Kei tried to reach his right hand toward around her lower part. Her warmth softly waved on his palm. Then Kei wanted the warmth again. Her breasts did not refuse his fingers. Kei forgot himself in her sweet, soft warmth. Kei noticed her shoulders tremble at the moment he touched the top of her breasts. The shiver slowly descended from the shoulders to the waist and then the knees. Rika threw out the word at a white wall which is ahead of her downcast eyes. “I don’t care substitute for Kaori.....” Rika turned around and tears overflowed in her eyes. It went along over and over again in the cheek slightly dyed in red and dispersed from the tip of the trembling chin. The tears split many times along the lines of tears drawn once and the teardrops absorbed tranquility around shining on the cold floor. "I'll hold you if you feel hard and sad... like Kaori does." Rika drew Kei’s back that sank down to her breast quietly. She wiped her tears with her palm and whispered in his ear. “Kei, we can go to college together and enjoy the so-called campus life. Isn’t that great? Parties with the club members every week. How about living together after graduation? I don’t say “marriage”. I won’t rush you. If we live together, I can go to bakery with you every Sunday morning. Breads are hot straight from the oven! Must be nice. I’m sure you will be gentle.” Kei looked up hearing her voice. Rika slowly lipped Kei’s cheek and kissed. Rika was waiting for Kei against the soft morning sun. She took a hamburger out of a paper bag that Kei bought at a fast-food shop in the station, and then smiled with pure eyes saying, “Thank you.” They went to Kei’s room biting a hamburger. On the way, Rika tried to talk to Kei gazing at his profile a couple of times, but withdrew her eyes immediately and kept on eating in silence. Kei also tried to talk to Rika something and searched words, but found nothing new. He just said, “This is good”, setting Rika’s untidy hair on her ear. For a second, Rika stopped, gazed at Kei and opened her mouth thinly. But she began to walk in silence again. Perhaps she didn’t find right words. When a shed with Ken’s room appeared on the right after going up a gentle slope, Kei stopped holding Rika’s shoulder. There were two shadows of squatting figures with legs stretched in the shade of the entrance against the morning sun. Rika’s eyes fell on them, following Kei’s eyes. Rika lost her words for a while because she noticed who they were. She gasped biting her lips and cried lowering her sobs. Then, she whispered in Kei’s ear standing on tiptoe. “Kei, don’t go.....Please....Let’s go back ....” Kei gazed at Rika firmly. “I’ll be right back.” Rika shook her head desperately stifling a sob. “No, never....Kei, don’t go.....” Kaori’s ankles moved slightly when a light sound of bicycle which slid down from the top of the slope. Once it disappeared in the shade of the shed and Kaori’s shadow appeared in the morning sun. “Kei?” At the moment Kei tried to call her name, Rika dropped her voice. It was a small voice, but carried well to Kaori. "That's not fair ...Really sly... Something wrong with you... Kaori-san has a boyfriend, right? Why do you run after her? ... All is over between two of you...Already over..." On the concrete road, a belt of light that came through leaves of roadside tree became complicated making mesh. In the transparent light, dry pebbles were scattered sparsely. Kaori approached slowly and said to Rika. Kaori’s shadow became bigger and her hair swayed from side to side on her shoulder. "Whether it has ended or not...I don’t think it's your business." "Stop it!" Kei suddenly spoke in a rough voice. Kaori glared at Kei. There was a flow of tears from her piercing eyes like Rika. "She was great? Much fresher than me, right?" She began to run leaving the words. The sound of the heel reflected on the road. The squeaking sounds rocked Key. Kei ran out and Rika’s voice scattered widely over his back. "Not fair! Kaori-san just pretends to be adult! She is just a wheedling girl. Don't go!" For a second Kei stopped to look back to Rika who fell down to the spot, but ran after Kaori soon. Kaori shook away Kei’s hands forcefully when he caught her by the shoulder before the station. Commuting businessmen and students turned around to see the events. Kaori leaned herself against the show window turning her back to Kei. And she concealed her eyes with the back of a small right hand. Her lips moved lifelessly feeling indication that Kei stood slowly sideward. "It's all right. ...You do as you like. You are always running away ... You would depend on anyone who can accept you ... You would kiss anyone, even make love." Her knees trembled faintly. Kei kept silent looking at it. The bustle flowing toward the station became remote. “Kaori, I didn’t sleep with Rika.” “Do you want me to believe it?” Kaori smiled faintly. “How about you,Kaori? Actually you slept with him, right?” "Never." “Me, neither. Do you want me to believe it?” “Why does a man dwell on it?”...You are the same as other guys...” Kaori squeezed the word firmly from her thin body. Then, she added a few words. “But, maybe...yeah, maybe... I love Osawa-san.” Kei lost his strength from his whole body as if various things were spilling from the tip of fingers that trembled faintly. Kei finally opened his mouth after a while. “Why do you want to hold back Osawa desperately? I don’t need the existence of “Osawa”.” “Kei, why don’t you understand me?...I want you to struggle your way upward...I just want you to do it...” Kaori’s shoulders trembled feebly. A line of light reflected by a pane came on Kaori’s wet cheeks. “You don’t understand it. You don’t know the machinery og society yet. How many sacrifices I made to meet Osawa-san...” Kei nodded. Kaori might be right. Kei muttered in his mind, but what he uttered was totally different. “That guy knows everything about me. Why did you talk to him?” “Don’t you understand that I wanted you to be connected with him? To make Osawa-san know about you, everything is necessary.” Kei asked all question left. “You could have left him any moment at that time..... But you didn’t intend to leave him....” “I couldn’t move because I lost the strength....that’s all....” The noise of train was swollen gradually. The heavy sound passed over the thick crowd many times and swept away the silence between two. There was a long silence for a while. Kaori looked up the sun above the bridge as if she averted her glance from Kei. Her red eyelids showed how many hours shed had waited for Kei. Then Kaori slowly fixed her eyes on Kei’s eyes and stared. Kei thought that Kaori looked another person. “But I can do anything for my beloved person.....I’m sure.” Kaori said it to Kei and began to walk slowly to the stairs at the station flooded with people. Kei saw Kaori off and looked fixedly at her who was slowly swallowed up by the quiet crowd with slight expectations that she might look back. Kei went back to the slope rapidly, but found Rika nowhere. He called her cellular phone hastily and sent a mail, too. But no reply returned. Kei thought it is no wonder. As soon as he opened the door of his room, he felt the fatigue from last night at once. Kei spread himself on the bed and looked at a record rack. He recalled Kaori who was excited when she came to the room. He sat up and erased it with the strong sunshine through the curtain. Then, he rested his gaze on the floor. Baby's-breath was utterly yellow and dried. White petals fell from the bunch and smashed into tiny pieces. Kei slowly got up and threw them into the sink, and lay down on the bed again. Kei fell asleep without notice. Kei woke up in the strong sunshine of the afternoon. He took a quick shower, got dressed and went to Rika’s apartment. He pushed the intercom on the door of Rika’s room and knocked the door a couple of times, but the no sign of life returned. At the moment he turned back and looked up the sky with no clouds, his cellular phone rang. It was Rika. Kei leaned against the rails of the corridor and opened it hastily. Kei wondered about Rika’s voice from the cellular phone. It was low, heavy and cool. “Kei, we made a detour too much.” At the same time, number 3 appeared and a conference call flashed on the upper right of the display and Rika’s eyes were imaged on the monitor. Kei lost his words looking at Rika’s cold eyes which were more transparent than the clear blue sky in the background. Rika’s smile which should had been on her face this morning died and a cold smile appeared on her lips instead. “I’ll tell you where I am two of you, OK?” Kei’s mouth froze with Rika’s words. Then Kei gazed at the display rotating slowly over there. At the same time, Kei doubted the third number shown on the corner. “Rika, Is another one Kaori? Joking? You can’t know Kaori’s phone number.” Kei said to Rika in a light voice as if he laughed it away somewhat, but the name shown on the monitor was actually her name. Rika didn’t look away and smiled at Kei who gave a bitter smile. “I backed up whole when I copied your mail address and phone number. To my notebook PC.” Kei’ eyes fell on outside the passage. On the right, a series of countless roofs of apparently used cars which was out of sight at night, were stuffed uncomfortably to the other side of the avenue which looked narrow. A sheaf of dazzling heat which bounced on the hood made Kei’s pupils contract. Kei withdrew his gaze from the sultry reflected heat at last and ran down the stairs in a hurry. The sweaty palm which grasped the rails was caked with reddish brown rust and the rust didn’t come off even though he tried to dust it off. When Kei turned left at the alley, buildings competing with each other came into Kei’s view. Kei ran to the entrance to the subway at the intersection. “I’m here, Yoga, a quiet area. Kaori-san, can you hear me? Are you with Osawa-san, right?” The noise of the sudden brake on the street died away in the distance. The cellular phone he held looked like a hard, chilled ice. Kei strained to hear Rika’s excited voice, losing his breath in silence “Kei, do you know where they are now? You don’t know..., in Kaori-san’s room. But I guess you don’t admit this even if I say so. You are submissive to Kaori-san, though. I‘ve looked up Kaori-san’s act and how Osawa-san’s wife spent the time. Well, let’s bring this to an end. All is over...” The end of central reservation looked warped with afternoon heat. The heat haze shimmered and flapped the circumference widely. “Rika, calm down. You just hurt yourself. Kaori, can you hear me? Are you really on line? Answer me.” “Kei, Kaori-san never answers you. You are too easy, Kei. A person who expects me most is Kaori-san. Kaori-san was waiting for this moment. Is that right? Kaori-san.” Rika was right. If Kaori is concerned about Osawa, Kaori should want to know about Osawa right now, here. Kei forgot himself running to the stairs of subway breathlessly. Once Kei looked away from the display and looked around The town was dancing with busy signals in the heat of midsummer. As Kei’s legs got gradually heavy, the outline of scenery became loose and motionless. Various things around Kei looked bare and floating in the space. Kei stopped and went into the narrow alley. Kei looked down at the image again with Rika’s voice, leaning against the wall of building. “I got to the middle of condominium. Whose kid is that playing there now?” The front of slide appeared the moment that the hard, clear blue sky flew in a line with one color. The moment Kei looked away from the silver setting sun with a strong brightness closing down straight. The small head appeared over the light. It went up the stairs shaking right and left. Kei thought it was a boy because it romped about holding the fence on the top of the stairs. The boy slid down splitting the sunlight and then, the back of a woman appeared suddenly. The tip of hair which grew to the back glowed on her white T-shirt and swayed. She looked like Osawa’s wife “This is live. Listen carefully....” The darkness fell with the dull sound of unzipping Rika’s bag. The soft light sometimes got in through the opening of her bag and the image altered into blue. “Are you Ryou Osawa’s wife?” There seems to be no response. It made Kei’s imagination swell more. If Kaori heard this, she would feel in the same way. If Rika’s guess was right, Osawa who was supposed to be there together should feel so. After a short silence, she said in a transparent voice, “Yes.....” She looked like asking mysteriously. “I’m a girl friend of a guy, Kei Kitami. He was deceived by a girl, Kaori Uemura and doesn’t face the reality.” “I don’t understand it.” The calm voice came to his ears. Then, Rika’s slow voice sounded. “I mean, a girl, Kaori Uemura is a hindrance to me because she has been going out with my boyfriend and your husband.” “What?” “Your husband has been dating with Kaori Uemura. Well, I could say Kaori has been dating with your husband. Anyway, it doesn’t matter which is which.” There was a long silence. Sometimes children’s yell floated over the darkness and died away in the distance. Kei looked up into space vertically along the wall of a building. The snow-white cloud swam low on the tip of his eyes and drifted far. Osawa’ wife finally opened her mouth. Her voice was much calmer than Kei thought regardless of the fantastic appearance of Rika. “Well, I vaguely noticed ...” “So, why do you ask him? My boyfriend loves the girl. They should have broken up, but he was still chasing her. He can’t put his feelings in order.” Kei didn’t hear Rika’s answer. Perhaps Rika nodded. Kei wiped the sweat on his eyelids and strained his ears. Kei peered into the image which made a light shade, but there was still the darkness. In the deep darkness, the chain of swing squeaked high. “I don’t doubt you, but I’ve experienced this kind of harassment so far. Suppose your story is right and I can ask him to reform him, I could feel easy...” “I didn’t come here all the way to tell a lie. Everything is true.” “Yeah, I know.” Silence fell again. The yell of children came back and sounded big, but cracked and went away. Kei lowered his breath under the heat got in. “I was one year older than him. When he joined the same company where I worked for now, I thought I don’t have to be there. I’ve worked frantically until then. There were many trashy programs and stupid guys besides. I thought I don’t want to be outdone by anyone. But I was outdone by him from the first. Though connection is necessary in this world, he refused most of them and attracted the artists one after another, composing his inner elements concretely to appeal the artists who he regards. On the other hand, I was pregnant....but had an abortion. I felt that he doesn’t need a child at present and we could not get along if a baby is born.... Rika said raising her voice. “I’m not interested in your husband’s success story and I have nothing to do with a sad story all the more. I want to stop everything.” “Yea, I know....Sorry...” Kei stared upon the image. A long silence continued and there seemed to have been a pause in the call. The darkness took on a dash of blue again and a calm voice of Osawa’s wife rose. Her next words aroused Kei’s interest, too. “But the girl likes him, right? There are not such cool guys in the world now. They desperately brush only the appearance. There are many guys who are off the point. The girl, maybe, had the same feeling as me. Think about it well...The girl dared to choose the married man, my husband, right? Of cause, I’m not happy hearing he is loved by the girl. I’m disturbed, too....because I was suddenly informed by you.” “Don’t you want them to break up?” “How?” “....don‘t know” “She will give up with your act like this?” Rika kept silent. The cellular phone made noise in her bag. “You are a very obedient, brave girl. You wavered much before you came here, right?” Kei saw a light came from the darkness in her bag. For a while, the silence went on, and then Rika’s feeble sob followed. Kei held his cellular phone tight, visualizing the trembling image of Rika. “If you have courage to come here, you should be a more wonderful girl. Don’t you think so? Maybe you could be a strong, smart, beautiful lady. I feel so.... I don’t want you to spend your time on this kind of matter now...” Rika’s sob cracked. She cried. Kei held his breath and closed his eyes looking up into space. Kei kept his mouth shut tight. Various expressions of Rika silhouetted in his eyes and flitted through. “I think it’s very hard to change a person’s feeling. So we had better leave it in peace for a while? OK?” The voice of Osawa’s wife got larger and Rika’s bag shook again. Maybe Osawa’s wife approached Rika. A dash of deep blue increased in the image and Kei heard Rika’s shaking cry quietly from the image. Kei thought that Rika’s tears flew more as the image swayed delicately. “Let’s go home, Taichi.” Kei heard dry footsteps on the ground, and the sound gradually became larger .Kei strained to hear the sound. Then he heard a sweet voice of the boy. “That girl was bullied by mom?” A laugh that sounded like lulling him dropped. “She accidentally fell over something. She can stand by herself, so let’s go home, OK? You wanna eat cookies?” “Yeah! “ Kei heard a lively voice and her voice of collecting herself together, and the voice sounded large. Kei also heard a mumble in the voice of Osawa’s wife that died away in the distance. “I’m indifferent to my makeup, maybe...” Kei heard Rika’s sob that got larger from the back of image waving faintly. He said gazing at a short shadow at his feet. “Rika, I’ll go there. Don’t go away. I’ll be right there.” “Yeah....I’m OK....No problem, really...Thank you....Kei...” Kei kept silent for a while hearing Rika’s words discharged barely. Then “3” on the display disappeared like being swallowed up. A normal call of two persons returned. Kei didn’t know whether it is Rika or Kaori. “Kaori, can you hear me? Is that you?” Kei asked so, going down the stairs to a subway, but the darkness of image kept quiet and just increased. After a while, there was a pause in the call. Kaori is with Osawa now as Rika said? Kei didn’t think that Rika’s action was a fake. No, he should trust her action. In fact, Kei heard a reply from Osawa’s wife and a voice of a little child, so Kei should have believed Rika’s words. Kei tried to recall and arrange Rika’s words passing through a ticket gate of subway, but he had to accept the reality presented by Rika as far as she chased two persons. But Kaori’s behavior and her warmth still flitted through his mind and never went away. Kei idly looked at the light of express train leaving, leaning against a post at the subway platform. It was Thursday, four days later from a day Kei located Osawa. Kei met Osawa at a coffee shop on the first floor of a building at Omotesando. It was already past 2:00 at midnight. Kei hesitated to contact Kaori and brooded over words to Rika, who had been absent from the prep school, for a few days. But Kei thought that he should meet Osawa directly and wants to meet him some day. Kei felt out words that Kaori left and found the way from that. Omotesando was almost deserted at night, different from Shinjuku. But as it was just next to Aoyama, a few foreign girls who looked like models passed on bare foot, swinging golden hair widely and scattering merry voice. On the counter of the shop a guy who looked like a clerk in a boutique was mortally drunk and lay on his face taking off his glasses on the side of an ashtray. In the back, a waiter with a thick beard turned a record. It was Bill Evans who refused to be hospitalized and died at live at the Keystone Korner. There was always a kind of impatience in his tune. Perhaps that’s because he was told that he could not live long. Kei did not like him. Osawa noticed Kei who was looking out of the window idly at the inmost table, and then sat at the same table. Kei had a moment of confusion because his behavior was too natural, but strangely he didn’t feel tension which he had felt from Osawa before. Kei was never affected by Osawa’s action of opening his notebook nor his cool eyes through deep blue lenses. “I thought you will come here someday. What do you want?” Osawa laid his hand on the rim of sunglasses. Then he looked down at Kei’s empty cup and said. Ice in a glass of iced coffee melted all and stagnated. A waiter came and Osawa said, “Regular.” And he cast Kei a glance. “Coffee, hot” Osawa laughed a little and said. “There are more than 50 kinds of coffee beans here. If combinations of blends are added, there would be over 1000. Would you like the same blend as mine?” Kei kept silent and blushed. Kei trusted Osawa a little because Osawa’s voice sounded calm like relieving the tension Kei felt. It was one side of Osawa which Kei had not felt. Kei was puzzled about that. Osawa told Kei resting his gaze on the display opened. “You might hear a little from Kaori, but I will tell you about me. Perhaps we could come to an arrangement with my story and it is also for your own sake.” Osawa’s clear eyes fell on Kei for a second. Kei was confused at Osawa’s calm look with large pupils and looked away from him. One taxi passed through a red signal that had just changed, and then disappeared on the other side of the crossing. “I graduated from K University. It is no too much to say that’s one of top 3 in Japan, it depends on college, though. But even in such a university, everyone searched desperately for a company at job hunting. People who entered a university from outside like me and easygoing people who went on with his or her father‘s occupation data scrutinized from early childhood are totally different. People from inside spent day and night in parties as usual because they had certain connections, but other people spent the desperate time. Osawa stopped tapping keys and looked out of the window. The eyes looked like recalling his memory. A waiter gave a cup with a saucer to each of two and left. “I thought at that time. Everything was settled from the beginning. So I found employment at the small production company of my own free will. And now I’m here like this.” Kei took a sip of coffee. He took a peep into the cup of bitter coffee. Osawa’s forelock reflected on the bottom of the cup swayed and blurred. “Do you respect my work some? Without thinking of Kaori.” Osawa fixed his eyes on Kei with a low voice. Kei did not answer it, but his eyes fell on the floor for a second. Osawa seemed to have understood looking at Key’s look. “Look out of the window.” Office workers who are seldom seen in Aoyama caught Key’s eyes. They seemed to have tried to call a taxi and stood on the road shoulder staggering and pulling each other’s tie “They are shit. They deceive themselves to varnish the reality that confronted them, using drinks, appearance and various things. Not others, you know, themselves.” Kei felt that Osawa’s voice shook with anger. Kei cast Osawa a glance quietly. Kei was deeply distressed to see Osawa’s eyes fallen on outside. His eyes did not show anger, even not pity with kind of contempt. They were just clear pupils like those of boys. Kei peeped Osawa’s look from his long forelock. His eyes looked as if he will never be an adult who shattered his dream that he had in his childhood. Osawa sipped a cup of coffee and said. “And to me you just look like them. Perhaps Kaori who has seen you has the same feeling as mine. That’s why she worries about you. She hopes you will not be one of them.” Kei searched his memory for some of her words. There were some he could recall clearly, but some words had already become vague and were going out of his memory. A kind of sound was lost in the image of Kaori who came across Key’s mind. Osawa shifted his eyes to the display again. And then the quiet, intermittent noise of touching the keys correctly sounded delicately like raindrops and fell on the corner of the table. “My father was just an officer of a town hall. I went to the hall with my friend to see how he works. At the counter, my father was contending with an old man, who was so called “a claimer” today. I still remember that my father constantly tapped the counter with his fingertips, irritated by a stream of abuse. The busy movement of his fingers irritated even me. My father was irritated because he could not answer well. He reacted endlessly to the problem, which didn’t seem to be agreed, at the window and there was no air of showing to the claimer to another room. I couldn’t understand what they were arguing, but a trifling matter, I guess. I thought that not only my farther but also the claimer was stupid. Their talk was a kind of faultfinding each other. It was like going on adding 0 to 0 without end. It never totals to 1. Nothing is born by just knocking each other. There was no positive passion for opening up something. I was disillusioned with my father’s service. He hoped to make me an officer and live in security, but it was obvious that I would not obey him as I was still young. In fact, it seemed to me that my father’s consideration was just trying to secure his life exactly. “Get out of here!” my father bawled at me for falling short of his expectations. So I left my house. When I was in my third year of high school, I came to Tokyo with a little money from my mother. And my father died of heart attack. It was just a year before drawing his pension.” Osawa’s mouth was closed lightly and his eyes flashed. It was the cool gaze that Kei had seen before. Osawa looked out of the window. In the back of the eyes, a red neon lamp on the street sparkled for a moment. He blinked the eyelids lightly and looked at the display again. “I had a favorite music program which I had loved since a pupil. I had been tied up listening to music through a radio. I still remember a radio program that I listened to those days, and the boss at that time and I work together now. He was, so to speak, my father. He closely cautioned me about that on-air. It is society. I was called by the board and roared repeatedly, but all of them were a matter of principle. On the night when we apologized in public, we went to Roppongi right away to drink. What I did was just a new topic for them. It will be forgotten in three days. Actually that was right. Nobody talks about that now. In fact, the artists who I took charge of laughed and said, “That was really exciting.” The stiff mood broadened into Osawa’s laughter. Kei was amused, too. Kei thought that he would have been delighted if he was on that occasion. But Osawa drowned out his smile immediately and said. It was a strong tone like demanding himself. “And a total of listeners for my program never drop to “0”. If a number close to “0” was left, the listeners were actual listeners. We make programs and broadcast for them.” Osawa’s eyes fell on the display again. A meaningless list of English letters appeared on the display was reflected clearly in the sunglasses. Kei sat down again and asked a question prepared. Kei noticed that his voice was trembling. “What about your wife and child?” “Why do you stick at that? If I were a normal office worker, this will end to a normal, trashy story. But I’m different. I am in the business with artists who steered music scenes in Japan. Their sense was totally different from general sense. That’s why I was attracted, and I must keep on supporting it. Do you understand what I want to say?” Oaswa’s right forefinger pushed up the sunglasses on his nose. In the back of glasses, the cold light sparkled again. “I need the existence of Kaori for my business.” Osawa said quietly like adding words. “Why on earth does my home have to do with you? It’s only Kaori’s business, right?” “Did you hear that call, didn’t you?” Osawa drew his chin in silence. Kei’s tense feeling changed to a sigh in a matter of seconds. Kei murmured “Kaori” in his mind, thinking of Rika’s right sense. Kei swallowed lightly. And moreover, he asked Osawa. Kei’s voice cracked a little. “Your wife had an abortion for you, thinking of you....” “That’s what she decided.” The sound of tapping the keys stopped. And Osawa stared at Kei sharply and said. The silence in the shop closed in over the table like being condensed. “That’s why I’m here.” Osawa rested his chin on hid hand shifting his eyes to the display and kept on talking. “Others might think it’s a showy work, but just a fifteen minutes program. Even if other two programs are added, the total per a week will be less than 10 hours. People who don’t listen to the program are much more than people who listen to it. When I chose this field, I lost control of a future meaning of myself as I knew various realities. You have your father, right?” Osawa’s eyes became gentle again and sounded Kei out. Kei looked for the answer for a while with Osawa’s gentle eyes and immediately remembered Kaori. For Kei, first, he should talk about Kaori now. Kei took a cup, looking away from Osawa. Coffee became lukewarm and stronger. “What for is Kaori here?” “Kaori? What for? Did you hear the story?” Osawa’s voice rose. Kei took the cup to his mouth again. “Kaori is not particularly here for me. She is with me for herself. She hopes to stay with me because she can get something from me. And I want her to stay beside me. That’s all.” Osawa rolled lightly up his sleeves of a white shirt and drank coffee. He cast outside a glance and said quietly. The rough tone faded away. “In future, major FM will be driven away more by radio on the Net. If my ability dies someday, I will be deserted by various things, not only Kaori. And I might lose everything I treasured. But I don’t hope to live life being afraid of losing something.” Kei bit the lower lip. He bent his head and gazed at his 501 jeans. A fair skin looked pale from the lap fallen out. Kei felt that the skin got still whiter with Osawa’s words. “What do you want to do with Kaori? You still want her to stay beside you?” Osawa told gently and Kei shut the mouth tight. Osawa’s voice gradually got thinner, and swelled with tenderness, too. “Have you thought like this? Just imagine you are so worthwhile that I am jealous of and I have such status and talent. Why didn’t Kaori leave you soon? Why didn’t Kaori try to leave you? I was jealous of you....” Kei tolerated Osawa’s words biting his back teeth. His shoulder stiffened, and he was ashamed of himself with annoyance because on one hand he regretted coming here somewhat; on the other hand, he got a feeling of contentment somewhere. A lump in his throat was just one thing. Kei wanted to meet Kaori. “Do you have something to ask me?” Kei shook his head bending his head. “I have something to ask you. No. I beg you a favor. I’m not talking about you. A girl who was with you.” Osawa said so and gave a deep sigh. Kei looked up at Osawa. Osawa was looking at cold street lamps in Omotesando where stillness had fallen. “Perhaps you love Kaori, but you must not forget that girl. And I want you to apologize to her. On that day I’ve gone a little too far. I should not ask you this, but we will not meet again....” Kei stood up to search his pocket. When the coins tinkled, Osawa who rested his gaze on the other side of the window murmured, “No.”, and said, “You have money for a taxi?” Kei ignored the word and took a step forward, but stopped just next to Osawa. Kei’s eyes fell on Osawa’s profile. With sharp eyes Osawa searched something shimmering in the display like searching something that was still a long way off a shape. Kei glanced at a waiter in the back of the counter and started to walk to the exit. Kei opened the door and breathed deeply in the uncomfortably warm night air. The dry scent of a shower beating the heated asphalt floated over the river of light that was formed on the road. Kei threw a few of T-shirts and underwear into a bag and left the room. The subway at past five was flooded with people like rush hour in the morning and people crushed. Their shoulders touched each other every time they swayed from side to side along the tube of subway and the odor of sweat oozed in the chill also swayed. Kei thought that he will meet Kaori once more before he goes back to his parents’ home. He felt that the day when he saw the port by night with Kaori was a long time ago. The night view Kei had seen once did not move him deeply like his first view. The view before his eyes was just a fiction of artificial light sending out with someone’s intention. It was too factitious to color artificially for the best possible look. The color scheme was so commonplace and false, so Kei thought that it was too empty to crash soon. The temporary beauty with direction was an eyesore for Ken. It must be a symbol of someone’s silly greed..... Kei went to the exit for staff in the back of the event hall. He decided to go back at once if he waits for Kaori for one hour, but can’t see her and one hour passes. He sat down at the bench. Sometimes a security guard stared at Kei, but he spent time making a pretense to gaze the night view After a while, Kaori appeared with Saki, among a group of girls. They smile peacefully each other and go to the platform of subway where Kei came out of. Kaori stopped to open her handbag. Then she took a cellular phone and gazed at it for a while. And Kaori slowly reversed her steps with saying good-bye, maybe. Turning round, Kaori busily tapped keys on the cellular phone and quickly closed it. Kei saw how they are going being couched in the shade of ever green grown over. Kei left the spot before Kaori’s figure became small and disappeared into the lights on the street. Kei didn’t look back to Kaori any more. Kei’s bag on his back appeared to get heavier. The cellular phone in his 501 jeans did not vibrate though two minutes passed. 1/9 2/9 3/9 4/9 5/9 6/9 7/9 8/9 9/9 Fin. images. U2 - No Line On The Horizon Live in Dublin _________________________________ _________________________________ _________________________________ _________________________________ Profile. In November 2014, we caught the attention of the party selected to undertake the publicity for a mobile phone that changed the face of the world with just a single model, and will conclude a confidentiality agreement with them. _________________________________ _________________________________ e

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